Sexual addiction recovery is a journey requiring ongoing self-awareness, accountability, and spiritual growth. For many, the Tenth Step of the 12-Step program provides an essential framework for maintaining progress and cultivating a balanced life. Rooted in the tradition of Sex Addicts Anonymous (SAA), Step Ten emphasizes regular self-reflection, amends, and spiritual connection as tools for staying on the path of recovery.

Embracing Spiritual Housecleaning

Step Ten reminds individuals in recovery to engage in regular "spiritual housecleaning," a discipline essential to maintaining long-term sobriety. As noted in Sex Addicts Anonymous (2012), “In the Tenth Step we embrace the discipline of regular spiritual housecleaning. Just as we took action to repair the damage we caused in the past, so we continue taking inventory of our behavior, and making amends when needed, in our lives today” (p. 52).

This practice helps prevent the accumulation of unresolved emotional or relational issues that can lead to relapse. By taking consistent inventory of behaviors and making amends promptly, individuals are empowered to face daily challenges with clarity and integrity.

Acknowledging Our Humanity

Recovery from sexual addiction does not mean attaining perfection. Instead, it involves embracing human fallibility with humility and self-compassion. As SAA emphasizes, “We are human, and we fall short of the mark regularly, even when we are abstinent from our addictive sexual behavior” (2012, p. 52).

Acknowledging this reality fosters an environment of growth rather than shame. Instead of spiraling into self-criticism when mistakes are made, individuals can use Step Ten to reflect, learn, and course-correct. This approach aligns with therapeutic insights, such as those offered by Patrick Carnes, who highlights the importance of addressing underlying shame in recovery processes.

The Power of Regular Inventory

At the heart of Step Ten is the practice of regular inventory, described in SAA literature as “the cornerstone of the Tenth Step. We set aside time to review our behavior, our dealings with others, our emotions, and our spiritual condition. Quiet time for self-reflection, without distraction, is essential” (2012, p. 52).

This discipline invites individuals to:

1. Reflect on their emotional and relational health.
2. Identify any behaviors that may have caused harm.
3. Take necessary steps to make amends or resolve conflicts.

Such intentionality strengthens emotional resilience and promotes accountability. For example, participants in the Family Strategies Counseling Center’s SABR program learn to integrate daily check-ins and journaling as tools for personal inventory. These exercises help individuals identify triggers, recognize patterns, and maintain a proactive approach to their recovery.

Integrating Therapeutic Support

While Step Ten offers a powerful personal framework, professional guidance often enhances its effectiveness. Therapists and support groups provide critical insights into behavioral patterns and emotional challenges, enabling individuals to deepen their self-awareness. The SABR program exemplifies this integration by blending evidence-based therapies with 12-Step principles, offering a holistic approach to recovery.

By combining therapeutic strategies with the regular practice of Step Ten, individuals can build sustainable habits that support emotional stability, relational harmony, and spiritual growth.

Conclusion

Step Ten is more than a recovery tool—it is a way of life. Its emphasis on self-reflection, amends, and spiritual connection helps individuals maintain their progress while addressing the inevitable challenges of life. As recovery expert Patrick Carnes often notes, lasting change comes from persistent effort and the willingness to face oneself with honesty and courage.

Family Strategies Counseling Center has actively serviced clients since 2000 in treatment for pornography addiction or sexually compulsive behavior. Our SABR program for adults, and Valor groups for young men can help you! Give us a call at (800) 614-8142 or visit our website for more information: Family Strategies Counseling Center.

References
Sex Addicts Anonymous. (2012). Sex Addicts Anonymous. International Service Organization of SAA, Inc.