Step Five of Sex Addicts Anonymous (SAA) is a pivotal milestone in the journey toward recovery from pornography and sex addiction. It moves individuals beyond self-deception and secrecy into a space of vulnerability and connection with others and a Higher Power. This step is transformative, requiring courage, honesty, and self-acceptance, all of which are integral to long-term healing.

Acknowledging the Damage of Secrecy

As outlined in SAA literature, secrecy fuels addiction. “As active sex addicts, we hid who we were and what we were doing—from others, but also from ourselves” (Sex Addicts Anonymous, 2012, p. 37). This concealment creates a double life, feeding guilt and shame that perpetuate addictive behaviors. Step Five breaks this cycle by inviting addicts to share their inventory from Step Four openly with themselves, a Higher Power, and a trusted confidant. This process of admitting faults allows individuals to shed the burden of their secrets and step into the light of truth.

The Transformative Power of Self-Acceptance

While the Fourth Step requires documenting a moral inventory, Step Five asks individuals to go further. “Although we have recorded a detailed inventory in the Fourth Step, it is a different thing altogether to admit the truth to ourselves. We need to be careful to acknowledge the exact nature of our wrongs inwardly so that denial can give way to acceptance” (Sex Addicts Anonymous, 2012, p. 37). This step fosters a deeper understanding of personal responsibility, encouraging acceptance rather than judgment. For many, this is the first step toward true self-forgiveness.

Psychologist Patrick Carnes emphasizes the role of acceptance in recovery, stating that acknowledgment of one’s actions and underlying trauma paves the way for healing. This perspective aligns with Step Five’s goal of breaking free from denial and allowing individuals to confront their behaviors with honesty.

Letting Go of Self-Deception

Self-deception often sustains addiction. In Step Five, individuals confront and dismantle the lies they’ve told themselves. “We take the Fifth Step when we come out of hiding, let go of self-deception, and acknowledge our reliance on a Higher Power” (Sex Addicts Anonymous, 2012, p. 37). This process enables addicts to redefine their self-concept, building it on authenticity rather than distortion.

Therapeutic interventions, such as those practiced in Family Strategies Counseling Center’s SABR program, reinforce the importance of honesty and vulnerability. Group therapy, guided self-reflection, and faith-based principles create a safe environment for this transformation.

Connecting with a Higher Power

SAA emphasizes the spiritual aspect of recovery. Step Five guides participants to admit their wrongs in the context of their relationship with a Higher Power. “Now, breaking free of secrecy, we admit our wrongs in the light of our relationship with the God of our understanding” (Sex Addicts Anonymous, 2012, p. 37). This spiritual connection fosters a sense of hope and purpose, which are crucial for sustained recovery.

The Role of Therapeutic Interventions

Programs like SABR integrate evidence-based approaches with the spiritual principles of SAA, creating a comprehensive recovery framework. SABR helps clients understand the psychological underpinnings of their addiction while promoting the vulnerability and self-honesty encouraged in Step Five. By addressing both spiritual and psychological needs, such programs empower clients to embrace accountability and find lasting recovery.

Conclusion

Step Five is a critical turning point in the journey to overcome pornography and sex addiction. By admitting their wrongs and letting go of self-deception, individuals find freedom from secrecy and shame. This step not only facilitates personal growth but also strengthens spiritual and interpersonal connections, laying the foundation for sustained healing.

Family Strategies Counseling Center has actively serviced clients since 2000 in treatment for pornography addiction or sexually compulsive behavior. Our SABR program for adults, and Valor groups for young men can help you! Give us a call (800) 614-8142 or visit our website for more information: Family Strategies Counseling Center.

References
Sex Addicts Anonymous. (2012). Sex addicts anonymous. International Service Organization of SAA, Inc.